As a result, we have made a decision to temporarily suspend access to Ocado.com for a few days in order to make some changes to our service. This will allow us to better serve our customers, particularly the vulnerable and elderly.
Allow me to translate those two sentences for those, unlike me and bd, who have little experience with modern corporate IT.
"
As a result, we have made a decision to temporarily suspend access to Ocado.com for a few days in order to make some changes to our service."
Oh shit! Our all singing, all dancing, cloud-based microservices architecture that all the bright young things told us would be infinitely scaleable, and would just need us to spin-up more cloud instances to increase capacity, doesn't in fact scale, not even to 200%. It's broken, bangaxed, fucked, and is now, like our head of IT, lying balled up in a corner crying.
"
This will allow us to better serve our customers, particularly the vulnerable and elderly."
Oh god I hope we can fix this enough in the next few days so that we can get it back on its feet and get at least some new orders through the system. Because the system is so rogered we're hoping that forcing people to prove that they are old or disabled will slow the flood of new orders enough that the chewing gun, bailing twine and gaffa tape will hold.