Just wondering if there are criteria that you look for when going with an eBay seller?
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Unfortunately, I don't have magic formula. I've been burned too. I fully agree with the OP's sentiments and I personally won't order anything from China ever again. I've had to invoke ebay buyer protection too many times.
The previously referenced seller in HK looks like they've built a substantial business selling semiconductors. They've been around for 4 years, offer 60 day return/replacement, and make themselves available via phone to answer questions (presumably in english). It doesn't strike me as a typical "sell and run" operation.
I'd be willing to risk $20 that their DS1742W is real and works. If not, there's plenty of avenues to resolve any issues.
Besides, it's only a clock chip. It's either going to work or not. And if they're not being completely honest about it being new, then it could be dead in a couple of years instead of 10, and the OP is no worse off. Hopefully the replacement hassle will include installation of a socket to try again, if needed.