Incidentally, the LED symbols are reversed on my attached image in the OP. The positive and negative sides of the LEDs are connected in the expected way to the electrolytic.
I think it's impossible to do what I wanted; I'll just use the dim supply to power half the PCB.
I don't think these chips are like the ones in BigClive's videos; I've encountered those before and their datasheets give them like seven differrent pins where as these have like four (since many of them are shorted, maybe internally, maybe on the PCB; not the same as the BP2861 for example for which all pins are distinct).
I don't want to use any other dimmer or anything. I'm going to have a bright mode and a dimmed mode which will use a radio/radar occupancy sensor. If I used a dimmer, I'd have to make two adjustments every time I wanted to change mode.