This sounds like the comedic "talk-ins" you get on 2m at hamfests. I actually used to drag my FT818 along just so I could listen to them getting lost and angry
![Laughing :-DD](https://www.eevblog.com/forum/Smileys/default/smiley_laughing.gif.pagespeed.ce._hfWAz_QHO.gif)
The most´hilarious samples of this type were available when big events or massive situations did lead to units from distant parts of the country being deployed to the region and being present on the radio net in the former times of analogue BOS radio (our PSB).
Episode 1.) Our twin city across the Rhine (situated in the federal state of Rheinland-Palatinate) Ludwigshafen is a city with a very high concentration of chemical industry. A major local event is the annual SAP Marathon, which is often routed through both cities and states. One of the companies which reside in Ludwigshafen is called Raschig. It exudes the smell of road marking paint multiplied hundredfold most of the time and sometimes even more.
Conversation on the combined inter-agency event special channel coming suddenly up during an otherwise dull waiting period:
<Marathon Lu 7-63 : a team of Paramedics or Firefighters from a remote, rural part of Rheinland-Palatinate, tasked with providing a first-aid post and close off a large intersection>:
(very agitated and partially scrambled) 'Marathon Lu from Marathon Lu 7-63!! You must stop, we must abort! Here was an industrial accident! It stinks and we do feel dizzy. What should we do? Send us help.. It smells so much. This must be dangerous'
'Marathon unit calling in Marathon Lu, please state your position!'
'Here is Marathon Lu 7-63..We are where the industrial accident is!'
'Marathon Lu 7-63 for Marathon Lu, what is you assigned position?'
'Here is Marathon Lu 7-63, we do not know. IT STINKS!'
'Marathon Lu 7-63, stand by!'
(here you could hear the conversation in the coordination center)
'Give me the list..lets see---7-63?!?'
(silence of a minute)
Parallel, regular police channel of Ludwigshafen:
'Ludwig 1107 <patrol car native to the area> for Ludwig <dispatch>?'
'Here's 1107 - what gives?'
'Do you know how the Raschig smells when it stinks normally?'
'Yes - so?'
'Ok, please proceed to the intersection Road A/Road B (which is behind the Raschig factory). There are some comrades from X-town at a marathon post - they believe that there was an accident at the factory because of the smell!'
(sound snippets of roaring laughter from various stations and units)
'Ludwig for 1107, we will continue our patrol. We passed by there earlier. Raschig smells since yesterday - somewhat, but not much!>
Episode 2.) During the violent Kurdish mass protests in the 90s, police units from the whole of Germany were deployed to Mannheim. One such unit apparently got lost:
'Cavalier <Pol. Ma foreign contigents directions and assignments> for Hanno 400 <unit of riot police from Hannover>, where are we here? We do not know where we are! Where should we go?>
'Hanno 400, can you describe your position?'
'Cavalier, there is a large building, looks like some company, and another one on the other side. And a parking lot...with a fence. And another, without a fence..'
(this description applies to several 100s or even 1000s of places in our metropolitan region, so it is useless)
'Hanno 400, can you see any conspicious landmarks?'
'We can see some hills in the distance, but they are not close'
(again not helpful, as this applies to 3 of the 4 cardinal directions here)
'Hanno 400, have you tried asking for directions to Point X?'
'Yes. The driver said that we should call the police - but we are the police!'
'Are you sure? (continuing in a pronounced dialect of SW Germany) Dohin wees die Bollizei wo se rumfaehrt! ('here the police knows where it drives around!''