Bad Electronics Jokes

[MK14]

Q: What's wrong with cashless electronic shopping tills or parking meter systems, that rely on your mobile phone, as the only way to pay?

A: Nothing.   
That can't be fixed by injecting, 10,000,000,000 volts into it, at mega high currents, to send that equipment, where it deserves.  Cash and credit cards etc, if it ain't broke, why fix it.

[DC1MC]

In this situation I will try one as well:

Q: How do open an electronic lock when the encryption fails ?

A: You talk to it, communication is the key.

[strawberry]

why A class amplifiers are so popular? because they are hot.

[MrMobodies]

Q: How do open an electronic lock when the encryption fails ?

A: You talk to it, communication is the key.

If you can't talk to it there is another option too and its called torque... when you are trying to smash or claw it open.

[niconiconi]

Q: What do you call a logic chip with extremely short signal rise time?

A: It's leading-edge technology.

[MK14]

Q: What do you call a logic chip with extremely sharp signals?

A: Bleeding-edge technology.

[MK14]

Here are some more, generated using ChatGPT.

Q: What did the digital clock say to its mother?
A: "Look, Ma! No hands!"

Q: Why was the math book always unhappy?
A: It had too many problems, and they just kept multiplying

Q: Why do programmers prefer dark mode?
A: Because the light attracts bugs!

Q: Why did the programmer quit his job?
A: Because he didn't get arrays!

Q: What did the Wi-Fi router say to the modem?
A: "Don't worry, I got this connection under CTRL!"

Q: How did the web developer hurt their back?
A: They strained it while carrying all their cache!

Q: Why did the computer go to the dentist?
A: It had Bluetooth!

Q: What's a computer's favorite kind of music?
A: Disk-o!

Q: What do you call a computer superhero?
A: CAPES (Computerized Algorithmic Protector of Electronic Systems)!

Q: What do you call a resistor with no resistance?
A: Useless!

Q: How do transistors communicate?
A: They use their transistor radios!

[MK14]

Q: An SDRAM, SSD, CPU and Tesla Coil, were arguing amongst themselves, as to which was the most powerful.  The SDRAM said it could store information and give very quick access to it.  The SSD said, no, no, I can store way, way more information than that.  The CPU said, it doesn't matter, as I can calculate massive amounts of information, on the fly.

A: The Tesla Coil said nothing, then built up 10 million volts and zapped the other components, into a vapour cloud, then said "I win".

[Nominal Animal]

Because of my lasy eye, I have coherent vision.

[SiliconWizard]

Q: Why do programmers prefer dark mode?
A: Because the light attracts bugs!

Good one. It may even be the true reason.

[MK14]

Q: Before University, you couldn't even spell physicist, so now you've graduated, how are things?

A: Great, now I is a physicist.

[MrMobodies]

Joke removed.

Sorry about that for making the joke.

I am obviously lacking in judgement and good taste.

[Nominal Animal]

the Titan’s single porthole was only certified to withstand the pressure at 1,300 metres and that OceanGate “refused to pay” for a porthole certified to 4,000 metres.

Well, the Titanic is only at 3800 metres, where the pressure is only 370 bar, which is just a little more than the 130 bar at 1300 metres, right?  Right?  Oh.  Oopsie!

[ebastler]

Here are some more, generated using ChatGPT.
[...]
Q: Why do programmers prefer dark mode?
A: Because the light attracts bugs!

Q: Why did the programmer quit his job?
A: Because he didn't get arrays!
[...]

I am kind of reassured that Google finds these jokes on web pages dating from 2017 or 2019, i.e. predating ChatGPT. So ChatGPT did not make these up, but learned them during its web-crawling training.

If ChatGPT had come up with these jokes on its own, I would be quite impressed but also slightly scared. Both require lateral thinking, and the second one also the association of words by sound which are spelled very differently. Not a feat I would expect an AI to be good at so far.

[MK14]

I am kind of reassured that Google finds these jokes on web pages dating from 2017 or 2019, i.e. predating ChatGPT. So ChatGPT did not make these up, but learned them during its web-crawling training.

If ChatGPT had come up with these jokes on its own, I would be quite impressed but also slightly scared. Both require lateral thinking, and the second one also the association of words by sound which are spelled very differently. Not a feat I would expect an AI to be good at so far.

Well here is my attempt at getting ChatGPT to make genuine (i.e. NOT already existing) jokes, where ChatGPT is the real author.  I used words and your 'name' from that post, to try and make it a genuine challenge.

ChatGPT Prompt:

Please write 5 really funny jokes in the format Q; followed by A:, each of which must include the following words or subjects.     ebastler, Germany and Google.

ChatGPT Results:

Q: Why did the e-bike enthusiast become an ebastler?
A: Because he couldn't resist the urge to "german-ify" his Google search for bike upgrades!

Q: How does a German programmer's Google search for jokes begin?
A: "Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Java." "Java who?" "Just kidding, let's Google some puns!"

Q: Why did the German student bring a laptop to the Google headquarters?
A: Because he wanted to show off his "Deutschmark" skills while searching for the secret to Google's success!

Q: What do you call a German comedian who loves using Google Translate in their act?
A: The ultimate "wordplayebastler" who knows how to make audiences laugh in any language!

Q: Why did the German chef refuse to use Google Maps while driving?
A: He said, "I'd rather take my chances getting lost than rely on technology that can't even pronounce 'Sauerkraut' correctly!"

Then I twisted things around, with a continuation of same thing, my updated second prompt:

Please repeat, but instead make 10 such jokes, using the words, MK14, UK and Bing.

ChatGPT's Second response (technically it was later than that, as I made a mistake, earlier):

Q: Why did the MK14 computer enroll in a UK comedy class?
A: It wanted to learn how to program the perfect punchline without relying on Bing for jokes!

Q: How does an MK14 computer search for its favorite UK rock band online?
A: It says, "Hey Bing, show me the 'byte'stones of British music!"

Q: Why did the MK14 computer choose to learn the British accent?
A: It wanted to sound more refined when it inevitably challenged Bing to a game of "Guess the Word with a Posher Pronunciation"!

Q: How does an MK14 computer react when it finds a hilarious British meme online?
A: It emits a series of beeps and boops, equivalent to a computer laughing uproariously, while secretly thanking the UK for its wit!

Q: Why did the MK14 computer become a fan of British detective shows?
A: It wanted to sharpen its deductive skills to solve the mystery of why people still use Bing for search queries!

Q: How does an MK14 computer explore the diverse cuisines of the UK?
A: It navigates through the digital realm, searching for Bing-approved recipes, all while dreaming of a perfectly timed fish and chips delivery!

Q: What did the MK14 computer say when asked about its preferred search engine?
A: "I may be an MK14, but I'm all about that UK charm—Bing, mate!"

Q: How does an MK14 computer plan a trip across the UK?
A: It meticulously calculates the shortest route between famous landmarks while secretly wondering if Bing will finally understand its British humor!

Q: What did the MK14 computer say to Bing when it couldn't find a satisfactory answer?
A: "Come on, Bing, put the 'UK' in 'seek'!"

Q: Why did the MK14 computer refuse to use Bing Maps for navigation?
A: It said, "I'd rather rely on my trusty algorithm and the occasional polite directions from passersby—I'm all about that authentic UK experience!"

Final try, Prompt:

Please repeat, but make the jokes, incredibly funny and excellent, this time, also instead make 10 such jokes, using the words, NotAFluke, Multimeter, Spain, Rain and EEVblog.

ChatGPT's Response:

Q: Why did the NotAFluke multimeter go on vacation to Spain?
A: It wanted to measure the "amplitude" of the flamenco dancers while dodging raindrops in style!

Q: How does a NotAFluke multimeter react when it encounters rain?
A: It exclaims, "Ohm my goodness! I better take cover before my circuits get all wet and my measurements go off the charts!"

Q: Why did the EEVblog host challenge a NotAFluke multimeter to a dance-off?
A: They wanted to see if the multimeter's "accuracy" extended to its groovy moves on the dance floor!

Q: What did the NotAFluke multimeter say to its friend during a heavy rainstorm?
A: "I guess you could say this weather is 'current'-ly making quite a splash!"

Q: Why did the NotAFluke multimeter become a celebrity in Spain?
A: Its precision in measuring the exact amount of rainfall made it the most sought-after weather forecaster on Spanish TV!

Q: How does a NotAFluke multimeter measure its love for Spain?
A: In "ohms" of admiration for the country's rich culture, beautiful landscapes, and, of course, the occasional rain shower!

Q: What did the NotAFluke multimeter say after attending a flamenco show in Spain?
A: "That was electrifying! The rhythm, the passion, the precise footwork—I'm positively charged with awe!"

Q: Why did the EEVblog host invite a NotAFluke multimeter to join their podcast episode about weather phenomena?
A: They knew the multimeter's knack for accurate measurements would make the discussion on rain absolutely "shocking"!

Q: How does a NotAFluke multimeter contribute to rain research in Spain?
A: By meticulously tracking the electrical properties of raindrops and ensuring the accuracy of weather data, it's a true "measuring maverick"!

Q: What did the NotAFluke multimeter say to its Spanish friend who was worried about the rain ruining their plans?
A: "Don't fret! With my precision and your knowledge of Spain, we'll 'volt'-age through any rainstorm and still have a great time!"

[MrMobodies]

Joke removed.

Sorry about that for making the joke.

I am obviously lacking in judgement and good taste.

[MK14]

Q:  Who in this thread, is making the most inappropriate jokes, where sadly, people lost their lives?

A: MK14, because even worse than that is to copy huge amounts of ChatGPT stuff, into this thread.

[MK14]

Q: If soldering up circuits, with things like wires, capacitors and resistors.  Which circuit is the quickest to solder up?

A: An open circuit

[SiliconWizard]

the Titan’s single porthole was only certified to withstand the pressure at 1,300 metres and that OceanGate “refused to pay” for a porthole certified to 4,000 metres.

Well, the Titanic is only at 3800 metres, where the pressure is only 370 bar, which is just a little more than the 130 bar at 1300 metres, right?  Right?  Oh.  Oopsie!

1300 m ought to be enough for anybody.

[MrMobodies]

the Titan’s single porthole was only certified to withstand the pressure at 1,300 metres and that OceanGate “refused to pay” for a porthole certified to 4,000 metres.

They were willing to pay for a potty onboard near to the porthole but discouraged the passengers from using it advising them to restrict their diet before the trip.

Q: What could jump off the pcb when it is subjected to vibration tests.

A: Jumpers.

[niconiconi]

Q: What would happen when an engineering professor teaches bad designs in a lecture on power supply units?

A: High drop-out.

[niconiconi]

Q: What did the investigators find after a software failure caused a self-driving car accident?

A: A crashed driver.

[MK14]

Q: Where do Bridge Rectifiers, keep all their cash?

A: In Big Capacitor Banks.

Q: How many batteries does it take, to make a cow?

A: None, as they can only be used to make (battery) hens.

[niconiconi]

Q: What do you say when you need to do metrology-grade RF power measurements but there's only a crude industrial-grade meter in the lab?

A: It's for the Birds.

[niconiconi]

Q: Why don't cheap low-end microcontrollers support a flat memory address space?

A: Market segmentation.