The Ugliest Car Ever

[xrunner]

An anti-thread to the other one ...

AMC Gremlin  -

[dr.diesel]

Edsel:

[Halcyon]

Mitsubishi Pajero Sport

[MarkS]

Pontiac Aztec:



Ugliest car of all time.

[b_force]

[xrunner]

Oh b_force I think you just outdid us all! 

[ez24]

Pontiac Aztec:



Ugliest car of all time.

A few years ago I heard a discussion on the radio about classic cars and one person asked the expert what "new" cars would become a classic.  He said the Aztek !

[b_force]

Oh b_force I think you just outdid us all! 

The bad part, they were pretty popular at some point.
Inside they are pretty comfy, but they drive like a wet piece of newspaper (we would say).
You just feel 30 years older.

The outside, brrrrrrr, shivers down my spine, the horror.

[VK5RC]

An Aussie love/hate classic was the Leyland P76, it's claim to fame was you could put a 44 gallon drum in the boot. To date I haven't had to do that yet with a car.

[Brumby]

An Aussie love/hate classic was the Leyland P76, it's claim to fame was you could put a 44 gallon drum in the boot. To date I haven't had to do that yet with a car.

Me either.

At my first full-time job, somebody had one and they locked their keys inside.  I was asked if I could help open it - so I said I'll have a look.  Turns out it was the easiest exercise I'd ever tried.  The gap between the body and door was so great you could almost get your hand through.

[vk6zgo]

I nominate the Airflow Chrysler:-
https://www.carsguide.com.au/car-news/1934-chrysler-airflow-27229

Of course, Chrysler proved in recent years that they can still make ugly cars:-

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dodge_Nitro

[Gary.M]

Beautiful! Seriously. This will become a classic.

[coppice]

Mitsubishi Pajero Sport

You might not like the styling, but it doesn't have that "bits of several cars, randomly stuck together" quality of the truly awful.

[vk6zgo]

An Aussie love/hate classic was the Leyland P76, it's claim to fame was you could put a 44 gallon drum in the boot. To date I haven't had to do that yet with a car.

They were popular in New Zealand, as you could put two spare sheep in the boot.

[Halcyon]

Mitsubishi Pajero Sport

You might not like the styling, but it doesn't have that "bits of several cars, randomly stuck together" quality of the truly awful.

You are quite right. It's just every time I see one, it makes me cringe. I don't know how anyone can look at one and think "oh gee, that looks great". Subaru's make me cringe too but I think it's more to do with the people that tend to be behind the wheel than anything else.

As for the "randomly stuck together", there are large amounts of those cheap, Chinese brands popping up here now. Great Wall, Chery, SAIC and Foton are probably among the more common ones. They aren't necessarily ugly, just generally very plain and generic looking. You can really tell the manufacturers have just rummaged through any old parts bin and slapped it together. I drove a Chery once, never again. It takes tinny, rattly and unsafe to a whole new level.

Apart from the Pajero sport, the next ugliest car on Australian roads at the moment would probably have to be the Nissan Juke. It's just so "bulbous" in all the wrong ways.

[tszaboo]

There is a better version for elderly people.

The Rover James.

The dashboard was simplified by Jeremy who ripped out the original dashboard and it replaced it with one of his own. The new dashboard has a hot and cold button for the air-conditioning and three light switches to toggle the wipers, lights, and radio (which has only one station) on and off. He also added a rear fog light switch which "does absolutely nothing". Clarkson also installed a simplified sat-nav system (which is a modified iPad) which has only the options: home, bingo, post office, Peggy's house. A big magnifying glass was also installed in the front.
While Jeremy was smashing the dashboard,Richard suggested that,since "elderly people are fragile and tend to sit quite far forward",the driver and passenger SRS airbags should be removed. However,after Clarkson opened the the passenger airbag compartment,they found that it was attached to two wires(beige and blue),and presumed that cutting the wrong one would result in the airbag detonating.After a very tense moment,Jeremy clipped the blue wire,which caused nothing to happen,to their relief. Presumably,the airbag was placed in the rear bumper as part of Richard's backup system.
Jeremy also modified the speedometer for the car in an attempt to speed old people up when driving. He replaced the traditional speedometer with the ones that only read 32 km/h, as opposed to 210 km/h in the old speedo.
Richard painted the Fiat beige, one that matches the colour of a hearing aid.

Richard also implemented new 'old people' specific safety features. First, he changed the front bumper of the car so that it was now much larger and made of very thick foam. He installed external airbags onto the rear so that they would detonate if the old person was about to back into an object (much to Jeremy's disappointment when this system was tested). He also put a squeaky ball under the brake pedal.
Hammond also softened the suspension of the Fiat.
A Rover grille was incorporated on the front of the design, as opposed to the original facade.
Clarkson replaced the foreign Fiat badges with a 'more appropriate' Rover badge and bolted a pet cage to the roof of the car.
Since elderly people are unable to lift their luggage into the boot, the presenters added a "lift-knob", which allowed luggage to be attached to it, and dragged along the way.
Both presenters also made modifications to the seats of the cars changing the standard Fiat rear seats to soft lounge chairs from - Shackletons (thanks to an old advert Jeremy found on YouTube). The front seats were also made waterproof, thanks to Hammond who managed to found the appropriate waterproof cloth for the seats. They also attached a new car locating system to the Rover James in which a rocket and a balloon are used to determine the location of the car in a parking lot.
As a final modification Jeremy installed a self destruct mechanism to the car which would detonate should an eldery person begin travelling down the wrong way on a slip road.

[Halcyon]

The front seats were also made waterproof, thanks to Hammond who managed to found the appropriate waterproof cloth for the seats.

Awful mental image there, but I think that was the intent!

Great story though. Clearly the guys at Top Gear put much more thought into that car than Fiat did.

[rdl]

Gremlins were actually fairly popular when I was growing up back in the late 70s/early 80s.

[Electro Detective]

Better dig up some butt ugly automobiles from an alternate universe,

b_force is THE clear winner here so far    

Imagine that steel and plastic pancake in your driveway,

wondering why the suss neighbours are always smiling... 

[Halcyon]

b_force is THE clear winner here so far    

Agreed. He wins the Internet this week.   

[Jeroen3]

Nissan Cube

[poorchava]

Well, my 2 candidates were already posted: Fiat Multipla and Nissan Cube. Cant; decide which is worse though....

[Moshly]

My vote goes to 'Chrysler PT Cruiser'

[Jwalling]

Here's a couple of stomach churners.

[Jwalling]

And when your car is SO ugly...