Dear Hacklordsniper"
--From some of the responses you are getting, it appears that you failed to make clear that, your goal is to assemble electronic projects, and not to hang drywall. I get these kinds of responses also. If you wanted a doorbell, they would tell you "Just have them knock".
--For a hilarious example of the "you should do what I want to do, instead of what you want to do" syndrome, from this blog, check out the link below:
https://www.eevblog.com/forum/index.php?topic=3425.0--P.S. Let us know if you find anything that meets your specs, and which you can easily find bits for. I might buy one myself.
"There are two possible outcomes: if the result confirms the hypothesis, then you've made a measurement. If the result is contrary to the hypothesis, then you've made a discovery." Enrico Fermi 1901 1954
Best Regards
Clear Ether