Security through obscurity does not mean that you must release the specs, but that releasing the specs should not degrade the security. I.e. making the protocol proprietary will not improve security. Opening the protocol proves that you only rely on the cryptography, and for example the fact that testing 2
127 combinations takes a very long time, rather than some obscure but trivial to figure out fact.
Add to this is that the far majority of people suck and writing secure software or protocols, and relying on standard protocols and standard implementations become a much safer bet. Look at the number of security holes that got fixed in almost any crypto protocol implementation. Are you much smarter then the people who wrote that, or does your implementation contain a similar number of bugs that you didn't find yet but a determined attacker might? Say you optimized a decryption function to make it run faster: you probably just made it vulnerable to side channel attacks.
My guess is that VW (and/or their supplier) overestimated the security level of the protocol. Whoever designed it thought it did not contain any unknown weaknesses, and either there was no review or the reviewer failed to spot it.
Very few thieves use lockpicking skills because the time it takes to learn, but also the time it takes to open the door. Plus you're looking quite suspicious if the neighbors come by. They rely on speed: smash a window and be gone in less then a minute before anyone notices you. This is generally not a problem for software security: you can buy a program to do the hard work, you can often work from a relatively safe location (eg. a car near the target car in the VW example), and nobody sees you interacting (unless they deployed a network intrusion system and are actually monitoring the alerts). Plus lockpicking is only easy for the cheap locks that nobody cares about (eg. random family homes). Anything containing valuables will use a more sophisticated lock that requires brute force to open without a key. For example a properly designed VW-branded electronic lock
.